Amazing what fifteen years can do...

This week I received The Little Foxes' contribution to the Quote This! II ring. All of the stamps had something to do with confronting fear and it seemed quite appropriate that I got that this week.

As I've mentioned before, I've started Aikido again after taking a break for fifteen years. I remember how I loved to do forward rolls and being thrown and falling when I was little. I would get this thrill at just effortlessly tucking my body and springing back up in a perfect hamni (stance).

Fast forward fifteen years. Front rolls are the bane of my existence. I hate seeing the floor come up and I dread practicing moves that involve me having to do a front roll. That changed a little this week. Summer is always a bad time for me with headaches and just generally not feeling good, so I haven't been able to go to the dojo as often as I'd like (there's a reason why I live in the northern part of the US!). Now that the weather is getting cooler, I've been going more often and have been able to concentrate more.

This week I felt a little twinge of the thrill I used to feel when doing front rolls. It actually felt good to feel my feet flying over my head and knowing that I am in perfect control. And on Thursday we practiced a move that I have never enjoyed because it basically has the defender turning the attacker's arm in to a staff and launching the attacker into a front roll. I have never been able to do the front roll without hitting my head or hurting my shoulder. But I actually managed to do a decent roll and stand up in hamni. Granted, I still hit my head or roll on my shoulder, but I'm not so afraid of it now.

I'm still amazed that in my (very) long break from Aikido, I became afraid of falling. I went from this fearless ten year old who would try any move, even if it looked really difficult, to a twenty-five year old who cringes when she sees the floor rushing up.

Fear is a funny thing.

Schoolin'

Yesterday was the first day of my second semester of library school. I'm only taking one class this semester since I've heard from others that this is one of the hardest classes of the program. It's "Organization of Knowledge", which is basically learning cataloging rules. It only meets every other Saturday, but for five hours each time. I honestly don't know if I'll like the class or not. Cataloging has never really interested me, but who knows? I could actually end up enjoying it.

There are a few familiar faces in the class, mostly from my Intro to LIS class. And "That" girl is in the new class. You know the type-always has something to say even if it has nothing to do with the topic at hand, argues almost everything the professor says, asks if every single chart or PowerPoint presentation is going to be posted on the class website, etc, etc. She was in my Reference Services class and by the end of the term, the professor was having none of it. It made for some interesting classes and the rest of us would place bets on how long it would take the professor to shut her down. By the end of class yesterday, I could tell that the professor for this class is going to get quite sick of her quite quickly.

In terms of my other schooling (aikido), the dojo is hosting a seminar this weekend with the head of the Virginia Aikikai Assocation. He's a 6th dan (a sixth degree black belt). They're doing testing this weekend as well. I really wanted to watch the testing since the next time they hold testing, I'll probably be the one being tested. I managed to catch the tail end of the testing after my Cataloging class. The upper ranks were testing and it was kind of intimidating. The whole test for the higher ranks is basically defending yourself against three or four attackers. It was amazing watching a woman probably a little taller than me send three tall men flying. I know that they've all been training for years, but I can't imagine being able to do that at this point. Someday...

Back into the swing of things

Well, I'm back from vacation. Uh, I mean "YAY! I'm back from vacation!" It's always a bit humbling to realize that every day life goes on without you and that you aren't really as important as you might think.

Don't get me wrong-vacation was fantasic. Give me a few days and I'll get around to uploading my pictures. But it's always hard to come back. I always have to stop and look around and see what has changed.

We've been back in Minneapolis for a couple of days now and things are returning to normal. The cats have forgiven us for leaving them in the care of my brother, I'm caught up at work and I've put a large dent in the pile of postals I received while I was gone. We were only gone a little over a week, but it seems like so much has changed. There's a new tech guy at work (who looks a lot like the character of Mason from Dead Like Me) and another guy at work got married. I have two Bleach episodes recorded that I have to watch and there were two new people at Aikido tonight who joined the dojo last week.

Ah, Aikido! I only skipped three of the classes I usually attend (the basic/beginner ones), but it seems like I've been missing them for months. I almost didn't go tonight, but I'm so glad I did. I felt a bit unsteady, but after the warm-up, I felt more centered than I have in a long time. I've only been doing Aikido for a little over a month, but already I find myself noticing how scattered I feel if I haven't attended class in a while. After a good class (actually, even after a bad one), I feel fantastic-more graceful, more centered, more peaceful. Tonight was a so-so class. My rolls still need a lot of work (something about the floor rushing up to me just freaks me out), but Sensei was pleased that I quickly caught on to the moves we went over tonight. I still don't feel like I'll be ready to test in September, but we'll see. I'm going to start going three nights a week next week.